Wow-ok so it has been a long time since i blogged last.  Not alot has happened-well sorta.  I had a job interview recently-yeah! But I think I slightly bombed it, sigh... I donno.  I have started/continued to work on stuff to sell in my etsy store that I have yet to set up.  I am making photo baby announcement and photo save the date cards in photoshop then plan to sell customized ones to people.  Who knows how it will go.  really like making the stuff, but alot of people sell the same thing on etsy. I plan to try an corner the market by selling em for cheaper than everyone else, but who knows.

On other news, I recently joined a new gym. It is a really great gym, but again motivation is seriously lacking and i am not sure how to keep  motivated.  I am seriously wanting to do this weight loss thing, but i am having a really hard time motivating myself...who knows.  I need to think of a good reward that will motivate me.  On the same food note I joined a 12 step program for food, called overeaters annonymous.  It bases its teaching on the 12 step program and on the foundations from AA.  I have gone to four meetings and am enjoying it.  I really realized that I am an over eater after they read step one...omg.  Ok, it was more when they read the stuff that goes along with step one.   So now i am trying to find a sponsor through the program. I also need to find/go to other meetings, our group leader/head person/whatever suggested I go to a few other meetings to make sure that the meeting was right for me.  ok, so thats enough on that...!!

Also, I finally realized/have been able to put into words to why I have been emotional about this whole baby thing.  I am mourning a loss.  A loss of mommy's nose, daddy's eyes, ect.  The loss is of having our own kiddo with features/traites that are ours.  This year has been really hard on me for this reason. I went through a breif mourning after I found out the details, but pretty much stuffed it in.  Well this year everyone who is of baby bearing age we know is preggers (ok not EVERYONE) but ALOT of people are pregnant or gave birth to a baby.  Well I broke down on the drive to one of my friends house for her shower.  It was really hard for me to be happy for her! I know that sounds selfish, but whatevs.  So I am not really looking forward to a different shower for a different girlfriend I am going to.  She is a sweet lady, and very well deserving of a child. She has gone through alot to get a healthy baby.  Ok, so enough on that!!

Goals have sorta/kinda been on the back burner. We have had the MIL over a few times for dinner, but not my parents :(  My parents are so busy it is hard to plane a dinner that works for both of us.  Also, I did goal #17-no soda for a month. but that is as long as it lasted-a month.  I need to do this again, but i like my fountain soda!!Also, I did do goal #26-go geocaching with kev. Him, I and my neice & nephew went geocaching one day-it was fun!We did get an associated bank checking account too!  I did join the womens group at church(59), The first meeting was this past tuesday, it is like 8 weeks long and we are studying the book   "the prodigal God".  The biggest "yeah" goal was #91, have the neice & nephew over for a sleep over-i got the oppertunity to do that-i was so happy!  I cant wait until their christmas break so i can hopefully have em over again!

Ok so that is about it blogy wise. Hopefully going to blog more often-but i wont promise anything!! 

Long Awaited photos

So this post is mostly about the digital scrapbooking album i made for my parents anniversary.  I omitted the last page because it had a personal letter to my parents, but you can see the rest of the pages!

Vlogging

Hey viewers-I know I havent posted in a LONG time-sorry. I promise a blog is in the works! But in the meantime some news.  So I am doing a weight loss vlogg. Each week I will weight in and discuss what is on my mind.  Check out the first one - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xCbnsrZPZ0A  Thanks!

Happy 4th of July Peeps!

So, here I am sitting at home blogging on America's Freedom day.  Oh well-can you say I have no life?  :)  So over this last week or two I have completed some goals!! yeah!! So two saturdays ago, Kevin and I went on a date night.  We went geocaching (#26) with the hubby. We had a couple that we wanted to find but not enough time to really look for then all.  So we went looking for two, and found one! yeah!! It actually was fun-I think if we didnt have other plans we would have done more geocaching.  That night we also went to a budget theatre by us-saw Hot Tub Time Machine. Pretty funny movie!!
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Just yesterday Kevin and I did goal #31, get a joint checking account at associated bank.  Nuff said on that one.
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The other goal I am SUPER proud of myself (and Kevin) for is going to a farmers market-and boy oh boy did we find a good one.  Ok, so I grew up in New Berlin, we never really had a farmers market-just a butt load of farm stands, so I guess I didnt know what to expect at a farmers market to some degree.  OMG!! we went to one in West Allis two saturdays ago-spent $12, got a weeks worth of veggies and some yogurt that was yummo!  So needless to say we went back this week-prices were slightly higher on some stuff, and selection changed slightly.  Only found one stand selling broccoli this week, last week almost everyone sold heads of broccoli.  The veggies were really good-I am guessing pesticides were prob used on some of it, but still the veggies are local, not from mexico and you usually are buying from the farmer themselves.
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On othr news, I have been busy with sparkpeople.com  I am a member of the site and was recently asked to be a sparkteam co-leader for a team with over 18,000 members.  I run the challenges section of the team and am really likeing it. It is keeping me motivated to stay on plan for weight loss!!

Ok, so thats about it for now - gotta go burn some calories!!

Goal completion recap - May & June

Hey so i have finally conoured many of my goals! woot woot!!  There are some goals that i have slacked on-but life happens. I am really happy at the amount of goals i have completed in the last two months!! So to start things off, I finished goal #11 - have a large picnic party with relatives family and friends.  Well we had one on the 19th of june. It was alot of work, but fun and we are planning to do it next year. We had between 25 and 30 people at the party. We had his family represented quite well by relatives and mine was represented only by my sister and her fam. Ah well- I will remember that next time relatives of mine... We also had BUTT LOADS of food-omg next year i am not going to buy as much food seriously.  We provided the meat (beer brats and hamburgers)  I also made a grape salad and did a veggie platter and made some cupcakes. Everyone that came brought something to pass.  I am so going to only count 1 and a quarter brats at most per person next year-holy crap way to many brats and burgers left over.  Also-Kevin's dad brought ALOT of food, some awesome chinese pulled pork, some salsa and some desserts.  So with everyone bringing food to pass and the stuff we made we had huge amounts of food.  I had alot of fun chit chatting with everyone-showing off the house and playing games. We set up croquet, ladderball and had a frisbee and sidewalk chalk.  It was fun, and there was no histerics wich was also VERY good-i was most concerned about that.  Also technically I could include goal #10  - Have people from church over. But I am not.  I invited three familys from our church to the party, out of those three only one couple ended up being able to come-it was our pastor and his wife.  It was nice that they came-they got to see our house and chit chat with our friends. They had an interesting convo about godparents and the catholic faith with another couple who is our friends.  So since it was only them, I dont think I will be counting that as a completed goal.  Some photos from the event follow!

So, another goal that i completed in the last two months is #18 finish and get printed a digital scrapbook.  I finished it yeah!! I made a digitalscrapbook for my parents anniversary. I will post pictures of that-just not today. I have jpegs of the pages, i just need to combine them into one image.  Soo-you'll have to wait on that one!!

We all know that we went to the shedd and to museum of science & industry over our anniversary. That was early in may. They were goal #34 & #35.

Also in prep for our big party I completed goal #45 & #46. Clean and organize closet in basement & clean and organize basement.  Now my basement looks pretty!! well sorta-it is a basement after all!!

I also did #90 - Write "the letter." It was not as elaborate or as indepth as i had imagined it to be. She called and we talked a little. She interpreted something I had saaid on FB was about her, I explained we talked a little more. It was good. Thats all.  

So other than these I havent really worked on many goals. I am working on the no soda thing tho-I am 3 weeks in and feeling good! I have been tempted alot lately but i have avoided my temptation with some luck!!

A long ass blog!!

So here I am, falling behind on my goals but still attempting them.  This isnt the reason for todays blog.  I feel just so out of it, frustrated and alot like a failure, and really need to flesh it out-so sorry peeps!  I have struggled with my weight since I was born practically.  I have medical issues that have held me back in different ways at different times.  And currently I dont have a job. I quite my job a year ago, I worked for my dad and it just got to be to much of an emotional drain for me.  My sister also worked there-and we have never gotten along.  It was an issue of never really having a set list of this is what you do at your job. Yes there was billing and ebay, but beyond that it was whatever they had for me whether it was inventory counting, shipping, light repetitive menufacturing (making ditty bags or two ball and tee packs) or just cleaning.  And it really got frustrating to be treated as lowest man on the totem pole, even though I wasnt the newest employee.  So needless to say, I know my dad was helping me by giving me a job, but I quit.  And looking back, I really am happy about my choice.  But a year has passed, I feel so bad that I am not helping to keep the house afloat.  But I really enjoy my time at home and sometimes wish I could be a stay at home wife (cook/clean/whatever). Pretty much that is what I do now. I dont know, I am sick of  really hearing about money and how if we had x we can do y.  This last month was hard on me guilt wise about money.  We have a large medical bill, a large dental bill, and our regular expenses.

So also I have really struggled with my weight and weight loss my whole life. I have had highs and lows of weight happyness, and really until I started this list I was more on the happier side of weight happyness.  I have delt with parents getting mad at me for eating sweets from their stash, my dad bribeing me to loose weight and my parents telling me how i need to watch what i am eating cuz diabetes runs in the family.  Seriously-shut up, dont you think I think about this myself enough?  Help me/support me-dont just tell me what i need to do. I am just really frustrated about my weight. I know I have to do it, and I have to choose to do it, but i know i really need support to stay on track, and hubby isnt that good when it comes to diet support-he tells me what i want to hear-not what i need to hear.  I know he loves me for who I am, but would like me to loose weight. It is just so hard to stay motivated on my own.  But I am going to try something new - not beating my self up and changing how I think. I am "trying" to get rid of the word diet from my vocabulary and change it with lifestyle change.  As a part of my lifestyle change I am going to only tackle one or two change per month.  Once it becomes habit or at least stuck to and scheduled, I will add a new lifestyle change goal.  So far I have crossed water drinking off my list of lifestyle goals as I regularly drink 2-3 liters a day.  As of tommorow a new lifestyle goal will be added.  I have dabbled in the arena before, but never really stuck to it.  A biggie goal on my 101 in 1001 is to walk a half marathon. Well officially I start training tommorow with Kevin. He has decided to join me. I asked him though that if he says yes-he needs to not say oh im tired on a day or something, he has to stick with it so i can stick with it.  I am a little nervous and excited at the same time.  It will be something for kevin and I to do together that is free and might help us connect a little more.  I am nervous because I hurt my back the weekend of our trip (clutzo me) and it still bothers me a bit, but i am sure excersize in the long run will be good.  So after I have successfuly integrated excersize into my routine I plan to adjust how i eat, now granted I am not going to go all out now, but I will have mini goals that go along with eating change.  Another goal that i have in terms of lifestyle changes, I have decided this month would be a good month to give up soda.  We are only one week into the month but i am doing good!! No soda for me!! I am very tempted though! We recently bought a bunch of two liter bottles of soda for the party and they are still sitting in the family room... So they are tempting but I will be ok-I think!! 

So in other goals, I finished a bigg ass digital scrapbook!!! woot woot!!  It is for an anniversary for someone I love. I promise to put a picture or two up here of the pages.  I did finish another book-I know rare right?? It was the rosie odonnel book "celebrity detox" good book!  Now I am reading "The Increadable Henry House"  I am really diggin the book-check it out if you like reading about the 40's and 50's. Um, other than that I havent done many of the goals, but i have another year and a half!! :p!  Ok peace out peeps!  Gotta go swish & swipe my bathroom!!

Procrastination!!

Oh man-ok so I have come to realize that I procrastinate big projects...  So here I am, four days away from needing to get my photo book turned in to blurb to redeem a coupon and to get said book done before the anniversary.  I have 5 pages done... yes I know sad but true.  I think for a while I was trying to decide if I wanted the professional black and white or if I wanted to use digi scrap stuff. Well I have decided to use the professional look.  I am almost done with another page-so we will see, I gotta get my butt moving on it! Oh-hubbys home GTG make food.  I have a blog planned for later-maybe after I finish the book.  It will be about happyness and how some people think just cause you are not fit you arnt happy.   Ok later y'all!

Goal #72 - Create a House cleaning schedule

Ok, so I am going to start by saying I HATE HOUSE CLEANING. I hate it with a passion. I think it has to do with that my mother is a house cleaning freak and lots of times growing up she would ask me to help and I wouldnt do it to her satisfaction and we would argue.  So I think that is why I hate cleaning-not totally sure-maybe I am just naturally a slob!  My roomates in college would deffinatly call me the later!! So I have checked out a website in the past and attempted to stick to the routines with little to no luck.  Well this time I also purchased a daily calendar thing.  The website is called FlyLady.com.  It helps you build a control journal for tasks to do on a daily basis and build a habit to it.  They also have weekly zones for deeper cleaning - but each task on a given day should only take you fifteen minutes.  So really each day I only pick up/clean whatever for like an hour total.  An example of my schedule is
Monday: My Errand Day
-Go to Library - return books
-Go to Grocery Store
-Decide what to make for wednesday Potluck
-Declutter for 15 Min.
-2min. in Hot spots
-Clean off hot spots in back of tub
-Swish & Swipe
So that is monday, some days have more-some have less.  Tuesdays and thursdays are my home blessing hour-I seperate otherwise I would get frustrated.  So I use my daily calender to write down what I have to do for the day, and cross off as I go. I was never a list maker-but I am liking how it is working out. I also get daily emails from Flylady.com to keep me on schedule.  So other than this I have been busy working on the photobook.  Also getting everything in order for our party next month.  So I have been busy!

3 Birds one stone and my anniversary!!

So, my third wedding anniversary has come and gone. It was May 5th, but it totally didnt start off on the right foot. OMG, the weekend will be most memorable because of all the issues that arose!!  So I figure I might as write this since I am certain it will come out at some point otherwise.  So if we look at our calender's may 5th was a wednesday.  It was originally supposed to be nothing super big since we planned to go to chi town for the weekend.  Well wednesday I got sick, like vomiting sick.  So, needless to say I ended up sleeping and vomiting all day-fun huh?  So by the time Kevin came home I was quite out of it, due to dehydration and adrenal crisis. Kevin wanted to take me to the hospital-I didnt want to go.  So after calling my parents to see what he should do, Kevin took me to the emergency room.  Also my mother met us there.  So, due to having sucky deep veins and dehydration, the only vein they could access-after 6 attemptes mind you - they got a vein in my thumb.  Then they pumped with fluids and solucortef and about three hours later they wanted to find a bigger vein. So they put a central line thingy in my neck-yeah fun  not.  So after getting but loads of tests done they moved me into the ICU overnight. They were concerned with my low bp (lowest was about 74/50) and my high heart rate-about 120 at it's highest.  The bp and hr were both caused by severe dehydration.  So after spending a night and most of a day in ICU, I got transfered to a regular room for another night and part of day.  I was ready to leave the hospital by the time I got transfered to a regular room, but they wanted to monitor me for another day.  I was super eager to get out especially that last day in the regular room.  We had planned to leave early for chicago that day.  But didnt leave until just after rush hour.  So I got released from the hospital friday afternoon-like 3ish we went home packed real fast and got on the road.  So friday night we kinda just chilled-we went to an awesome restaraunt.  It was called Miller's ale house-I think it was in oak terrace.  Really good food.  They even had fried clams!!  So cool.  Also kevin and I got a fish fry that was good as well-a little rich and over fried, but good.  So that night we came back to the hotel and slept. Got up early the next day and went to the museum of science and industry-so cool i must say!!  Very awesome exibits and stuff.  So we were half way through and went to go and sit at a mini computerized exibit that was about the earth-a big computerized globe in the middle.  Well there is like two steps up and then a row of chairs.  Well the exibit ended and we were getting up to leave and clutzo me didnt remeber or pay attention to the steps and tripped somehow and fell.  All I could think about for a minute was omg-I look like an idiot!!  But I must say, museum of S & I was VERY responsive-within a few seconds of falling they asked if I wanted an ambulance-I said no. No way in hell was I going back to a hospital!!  So in the end I beleive I pulled a muscle in my foot and two muscles in my back.  I have been taking pain meds and iced it a few times the first day or so.  Kevin and I continued through the m of s&i and I still had a good time even though my back was killing me and I had to walk funny cuz my foot hurt.  So that night we went back to the hotel and kevin got sick.  He was vomiting a few times. I kept him hydrated though.  I let him sleep it off for a few hours then we went out so I could get some grub and we went to walgreens again.  He ended up really just eating to much greasy food i think.  He still wasnt 100% the next morning, but good enough to go to the Shedd aquarium.  I loved it-I love the fish stuff! LOL!! We also went to the Field museum wich was just eh in my opinion. Kevin liked it-he liked the dino stuff.   So we wanted to see the adler as well, but we were to tired so we drove home.  We stopped at the bridge oasis thingy. I wanted a munchy for the drive and kevin was hungry as well.  So that was my three birds with one stone. We celebrated our anniversary (#1), Completed goal #34 go to museum of science & industry (#2) and goal #35 go to shedd aquarium.  Other than that not many goals have been worked on.  I want to start reading agin, but I am still so busy with my photo projects.  I finally finished the invites for the party and finally sent them out-thank God it is done!! Now I am just searching through my photos to make sure I scanned all the ones I need. I am also going through my previously scanned photos and cropping them down.  I have completed about four pages of the book, so we will see. I gotta finish by June 1, so I can send it off to blurb. 
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I am thankful for my husband and his concern he showed towards me. It is nice to have someone other than your parents concerned/thinking about you. 

And The Adventure Continues!!

So my week so far has been good.  Got my invites done for the party-I'll put some pics up later of them.  I am also done scanning all my parents paper photos! woohoo on that on!!  No more sneaking around to take photos and bring them back while my parents are on vacation.  I have also started stuff for selling on etsy. I have some photo cards made, and i made a few sets of decopage (sp) clippys!  I'll let y'all know when the store is up and running.  A big project i have to start is a photo book that I need to finish by early june so i can get it made up.
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On the vegan/vegetarian food eating front, I have borrowed a few books from the library that look very promiseing.  I am starting as of today to try a week eating vegetarian/vegan.  I tryed a while back i know...hopefully this time it will be better.  My reasons for choosing to do this is because of the animal cruelty fact and really that meat is really not that totally healthy for you.  Also, this will not be a "new" "diet" or something. I will be writting what I eat still, and staying within a lower calorie guideline.  Also am going to restart(I know...we wont go there) the walking program. I really actually enjoyed walking and haveing some me time.  When I started the walking originally I TOTALLY dreaded it!  I remember walking with my mom when I was younger and always upset that I couldnt keep up with her!  I do not have timeing goals with the walking - just completed or not completed.  I am gonna start small again since I havent walked in about a month(yes  yess - hush now I know I have strayed!) 
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So I have been totally researching the whole vegetarian/vegan thing to get myself prepared. I am also following QUITE a few veg blogs.  One of the blogs directed me to a documentary film about animal cruelty. It was NOT produced by PETA-wich was good in my book since peta is a hypocritical orginazation. If you dont know what I'm talking about google em.  The documentary is called Earthlings. It is about all the aspects of animal cruelty, very very interesting. I say watch it!!  Although-dont eat aroung the time you watch it-you may loose your lunch!  Also not children friendly at all.  But very informative for the average consumer.  Another warning-it has been called "The vegan maker" movie.  So link is provided to site. On the top there is a thing that says watch movie. you can actually watch a low quality version on line.  Again-very worth the hour and a half of you time it will take to watch!! http://www.earthlings.com/
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Not much else really going on.  Planning to blog about my week eating veg.  I started out today with a vegan oatmeal raison cookie panuffin-yummo!  comment if ya want the recipe!!

Ahh... I am relaxed and Rejuvinated...and I have alot on my mind at the same time...

So, today I got back from an awesome women's retreat!! I liked the previous years retreats, but for some reason I really really enjoyed myself.  I got to see a good ole friend of mine. I went to HS with this girl, and she has recently (within the last two years) turned her life to Christ. I don't have many friends at all and often dont see them as often as I'd like, so it was really nice to spend a small part of the weekend with her, and giggle like how we used to.  Also, we had a great speaker! We studyed the story of Joseph, his teen years, his 30's and later. It was good.  The part that really "hit me" was when we talked about the waiting rooms in our life. I totally feel that way... Again, yes I'm going there, so leave now if you dont want to read!  I feel at a total crossroads right now. I guess I dont know how to put it.  God has a plan laid out for us all, whether we know it yet or not.  I feel that we (I) am in the waiting room of "here I am Lord, I'm married, now what? Where are the kids that we are wanting?"  Waiting for the path to be laid out.  I really struggle with that, and have been since EVERYONE (ok well maybe about 6 people) we know are either pregnant, had a baby recently, or are thinking they could be preg. since they havent had a period in XYZ days. (sorry if that is tmi for some!)  I know this is a test from God, but seriously-does it have to be this hard? Well ok, guess that went better than I thought it would be.  A good thing out of this whole weekend, is Kevin and I talked and he knows how my heart is and how I am feeling about all this.  Also, in case any one doesnt know, he doesnt really truly believe in God, he goes to church, but that is it!  So I got motivated from my good friend I had at the retreat, to start a go through the bible in a year plan thing. Kevin is gonna do it to!! yeah!! I am happy.
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Ok, so on to other things, the diet has been WAY on the back burner...I know I know...   I plan to for sure start back up on monday. I was really hit in the face again today as why I need to loose weight, I am out of breath after walking up a flight and a half of stairs-seriously... sad...   I know how I got off track, so it wont be to hard to get back on track. But sticking to it...thats were I fail...alot. 
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I have alot of "goals" for this coming week.  I am gonna finish my invites for a party we are gonna have mid june. I made them on photoshop with digiscrap elements and am getting them printed in photo format.  Also, I am very serious on making photo cards to sell on etsy.  I am not expecting to make alot of money, but I really enjoy taking photos with my SLR, and want others to experience my view through the lens in a card they can mail to a friend.  Oh yes, and working on the diet. Those are the main goals for the week.   Oh also, one HUGE goal was completed!! woot!! I finished scanning all of my parents paper photos!! woo hoo!!   ok night all!!

Bibile passage mentioned yesterday

Hey folks-just a super quick post about the bible reference mentioned last night regarding our current church.  Check out the verse for your self.  If you have questions let me know!

Hebrews 5:11-14
Warning Against Falling Away


11We have much to say about this, but it is hard to explain because you are slow to learn. 12In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God's word all over again. You need milk, not solid food! 13Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness. 14But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil.
 
Ok thats it for tonight!

Pupusa's, Panuffins and more!!

Well if that title doesnt get you intrigued, I dont know what will!!  I cant believe it has been a week and a half since I last posted-seriously slackin!! So needless to say I have been somewhat busy working on my goals.  I have arranged all my digiscrap crap so I can find files super easy now. Also chose photos for the book.  Now both of these projects have semi similar due dates. I want to get the party invite done SOON!  I want to send them out the first week in may.  The photo book surprise needs to be done by the first of june so I can send it in to Blurb.com and get it made.  So I am busy. Also I have borrewed A LOT of cooking books from two local librarys (6 books) for vegetarian dishes.  I am so serious about eating in a more vegetarian way, but i know there will be times when meat is what I will crave. So I am going to be more of a flexitarian than a vegetarian.
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So what is a pupusa you ask?? Well it is a cheese filled pocket thingy. the pocket or dough is made from mesa - the same thing corn tortilla's are made from. These are a staple food item in El Salvador.  So I got really interested in these from a food network show.  Since I dont know of any El Savadorian restaurants by us, I chose to make my own.  I found a recipie onlone, got my mesa and made em.  I failed...  Well sorta.  I cant do the cool hand flipping thing, so i had to improvise by press with hand then flip, then press and flip again until i had a decent size.  I put some shredded cheese in it and then repatted it out and cooked em in a very little bit of oil.  Well they cooked up somewhat fast. Kevin and I devoured them and my reveiw is just meh.  I am not a corn tortilla lover, so thusly thought it was a little to corn tortillay!  Also needed more cheese somehow.  Probably will make it again, but add beef and maybe seasoning or something-who knows!!  Here are pictures of the pupusa's. 

Pupusa before Cooking.                      Pupusa's after cooking.

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So now that I explained one weird word, lemme explain what panuffins are!  It is a made up word. A mix between pancake and muffin.  Some people call it a pizzert.  Mix between pizza and dessert.  But seriously -this is one great breakfast treat. Easy to do and quick cooking!  And-this is a totally vegetarian item!! Woohoo! I even topped it with vegan buttery spread. (a margerine like spread made from vegetable oils and soy.  Earth Balance is the name. It is actually pretty good - a little salty tasteing for me, but good.  Also has non hydrodgenated oils in it.)  I made a blueberry muffin panuffin, but plan to make a cinnamon roll version soon!!  Here is a picture!    The recipie was quit simple and ingredients easy to get.  The reason I named it a panuffin is because the recipie makes enough for two serving. You can put in a muffin tin or put it in a cake pan. When you do that it will look like a pancake.  I will update with a recipie for this tommorow!! Enjoy the pictures for now!

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So some other things that I am going to talk about is how I have been trying to live a greener lifestyle. I am saddened by all the plastic that has ended up in the ocean.  Talking about plastic brings me to my topic. Is Seventh Generation really that "Green"?  My opinion-heck no.  Their products still have a large enough footprint.  Yes there products are environmentally friendly and dont have toxic chemicals in them.  But what are they packaged in? PLASTIC! Yes it may be something like 75% Post Consumer recycled plastic, but still it is gonna end up in the ocean.  Also, they are supposidly so green, why the hooey do they sell DISPOSABLE PLASTIC DIAPERS??      Hello-pollutent or what.  It is said that 92% of all disposable diapers end up in the lanfill.  Most people do not properly empty the poo out of the dipers, so you have a landfill with millions of diapers with poo in them-lovely huh??  Also Seventh Generation uses a chemical in the diapers that is rather toxic, but then again all diaper makers in the us put this chemical in.  There are SOO many alternatives to plastic and to disposable one time use everything.   I have never been so concerned with the environment until the last few years.  I urge you to watch this youtube movie. Please inform yourself!  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uLrVCI4N67M&feature=related  Ok so that is hopefully the end of that rant!! lol!!  On a note about us and recycleing, we try to recycle everything we can, but we still buy things made of plastic because of its at the moment convenience.  But I try. If our condo would allow it I would probably have a small countertop style compost bin. But alas our condo board is not as environmentally friendly. But talking about the board is a whole other topic for a different day.

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So I mentioned on FB that I found a new church!! Kevin isnt sure what he believes so I am usually the church finder goer person. He does come with, but if he was able to stay home and play WoW instead, he wouldnt go.  So anyhow Kev and I started going to Crossroads about four years ago. We got married there as well.  It is a wonderful family of people. They really are great. But the service feels like baby food.  I dont know how to explain it better. There is a verse in the bible about new beleivers and not being able to live on baby food forever, and you need to eat meat and potatoes.  Another explanation, I feel very much like I do at catholic services. Repitition, repitition, repitition. I guess my explanations suck! lol! Also it is hard because we live further away than we did when we originally started going.  So I looked up on the web non denominational churches in the oak creek area. And found a smallish church pretty close to us called Harvest Community Church. It Rawks!! OMG!! I love the P&W time!  Songs I havent heard before, but pull at your heartstrings.  THe message was very relatable and totally not fill in the blank like crossroads is.  I used to go to a church similar to Harvest and really liked it.  Also I love that Harvest is big enough to 1) Have three services, one saturday night and two on sunday, and 2) to have many small groups to choose from. I love small groups. Harvest has a young couples type group-wich is totally cool.   I am sad that we will be leaving crossroads within this year, but I am excited for what my future with Christ and this new church.  I want to slowly fase out of crossroads.  But it will be hard I know.  I will miss many of the people when we do eventually leave.  Alot to think about.  Ok well I better go!  Got to go to Crossroads tommorow morning early!! We have AV duty!!   Tommorow is WI, so I will be posting a blog regarding my weight loss over the past few weeks!!  Night y'all!!

Mid Week Check in & a recipie!

Hey y'all, just here to write a quickie.  Havent had much going on around here since easter.  My food eating/excersizing hasnt really picked up-still have a head cold and hacking away every few minutes-yeah...!  So on my two biggie goals that I have been wanting/needing to work on, I sorta have. I have been working on preliminary stuff, organizing my digiscrap files, and just general computer decluttering. I have been on the look out for really good cook out graphics that would work.  I still have to filter through my scanned photos and decide wich ones to use for the book, and I have to scan more photos. I am going to sneak over there late this week and grab another paper size box. My mom will be out of town and my dad wont know better - he isnt as anal about the photos as my mom is!! lol!! 
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On a different front I baked/cooked something new! lol! I made whole wheat flatbread like things.  I altered a recipie that called for whole wheat and white flour.  I put in regular whole wheat flour and whole wheat pastry flour (finer ground) and water of course. It was good, a little tedious.  Also they were a bit bland, would possible add spices or garlic or something next time. but they are good sammie flatbreads. 
Recipie is
-1.5C Whole wheat pastry flour
-1.5C Regular whole wheat flour
-pinch of salt
-1.25C water

Add water to flour and salt mixture.  Mix with a spoon or spatula until loosly combined. then use your hands to combine thoroughly.  Knead dough for a few minutes. Cut dou into 16 equal peices. Form each peice into a ball, then flatten by rolling or with your hands.  should be a thing round when done rolling/forming.  Place one at a time in a heated skillet on high  heat.  Once in pan peirce a few times with fork. Keep in pan for a few minutes per side.  They should appear light brown with specks of brown /black when done. Flip and cook for a few more minutes.  Do this with all peices. Enjoy!!

So yesterday I had a PB and banana sammie on the flatbread.  I like em. I entended to make them for a chicken taco like thing, but we ended up going out last night so later this week we will make em! thats it for today!!
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Today I am thankful that I am learning how to eat good foods for really a first time in my life.  I have been on ww-but i always resorted to processed foods that were within points that i could eat.  Now I am really reading labels and seeing if the light version is really better than the regular version. 

Mondays Blog

So I started to post a blog yesterday, but got involved with something, so i forgot to finish! lol!!  So here I am today finally bloggin. So this week, i forgot to weight my self. I was busy, we had the mil sleeping over on saturday, went to church early sunday and then all day at my parents for easter celebrations.  So havent done it yet, also forgot this morning. So hopefully I will remember to weight myself tommorow morning and then i'll record it.  My week diet wise has been a little off, we (kevin & I) have been sick with fairly bad head & chest colds that we think we got from someone at my nephews birthday party.  But i also havent gone overboard food wise-i have just kinda reverted back to my old ways of not eating enough food.  I naturally am not as hungry as most people/dont eat as much as most people.  We did go out for dinner a couple times like I stated last post, but really the only sit down was thursday with mil. It was a greek place and I had one cabbage roll and mashed potatoes and cheesecake dessert.  The rest of the times we went out to eat was to cousins or subway for a sub, wich isnt  super great, but better than a burger place or sit down place most likely.  Also I havent done any additional walking this week-well i did my walk on monday and tuesday last week i think. But other than that nothing excersize wise-grr.  Hopefully I will feel better soon and start walking again, even if it is just a mile at one time. Something is better than nothing excersize wise.
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So goals that were accomplished (yeah!) are taking a roll of film on slr camera a month.  I was A BIT late on taking the photos-oops!!  I finished the roll today. Took some leave bud photos and some cherry blossom bud photos.  Spring is so beautiful, especially with the budding of leaves and flowers.  Going to get them developed sometime this week. I know I still have to scan and upload feb photos, and now adding march to that.  Cant wait for the buds to bloom!!  Also working on the creating a garden in my grandma's name-i think that is a goal of mine??!  I am not going to do flowers at all this year-especially after the bees and all last year.  So it will be all veggies this year! I have started the germination process for seeds. It is giving my brown thumb a bit of a helping hand.  When I plant em, they will have already sprouted and will take easier to planting!  Other than that goals are not going as fast as Id like, Still &#%*^@$ reading book four on my list- i just havent set time asside to read it. I am half way done with it, but still havent finished-grr!   I really want to work on my vegan meals/no white sugar/no refined flour, but it is really hard because i dont know were to turn for affordable alternatives.  I have wheat flour, but still there are alot of gf alternatives I want to try.  I really want to make a go at being vegetarian for more than a day, but again hard for me to do.    I really think eliminating meat is important with loosing weight, but do to my raising it is hard for me to like meat alternatives.  If I did turn vegetarian it would most likely be lacto/ovo vegetarian.  (eat milk prod. & eggs).  I just am not sure where to turn for resources for it, and I have gone to many veg sites.  Oh well, if it is meant to happen it will. 
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So, thats about it for tonight.  I am starting to work on a biggish graphic project (making our own cook out invites) and then I will also be working an a very big (in my opinion) photo book project for a family members anniversary.  I hope to accomplish work on these goals this week!  
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Tongiht I am thankful that Tylenol Cold was invented! It has helped tons with my cold.  Also thankful for my husband. Thankful that he isnt pressuring me into getting whatever job possible to help us financially.  I am also really thankful for my church family and power of prayer. 

Week 3 on plan

So week three on my eating plan is coming to a close. I am not sure if i will loose or gain this week. I have been sick with a head cold since tuesday, so I havent gotten much excersize in this week.  Also, havent eaten totally good. We have gone out for food the last few days. The only bad day going out wise was thursday.  I had cabbage rolls with mashed potatoes at a local greek restaraunt.  So alot of meat and starch.  So hopefully next week is better.
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On other news, Kevin and I did AV at church tonight for good friday. A really good service.  The mood was somewhat intamite, quiet, calm. The lights were set low, music was good, and message was good.  Also they had a nailing your sins to the cross segment-pretty cool.  Also had the Lord's supper. Altogether a good service.    So, it's friday, but sunday is a comin!  Watch the video peeps!  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=naajYZSbWdw

Also another super cool vid of a skit based on Lifehouse Everything song. Very cool!  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cyheJ480LYA 
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on other news, not much is happening goal wise :(  I still havent finished book four-grr!  I did get some postcards from postcrossing this week. Plan to send more this coming week.
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Easter weekend plans are going to be busy!  We are having Kevin's mom sleep over on saturday, she will come to church with us on sunday then go with us to my parents house for a fun day of festivities!! woohoo!!  I just hope she doesnt talk about us seeing the repro endo-my parents dont know we went to see the doc.  So, also on that note this week I have been alot better stress and emotionally about the whole deal.  It is still hard to see/hear people talking about their babys or pregnancys.  Oh well I am sure that will pass in time.  So we plan to start pursueing adoption, but I think we still need to inform my parents of our planes for the future.   So I hope every one has a safe and happy easter! 
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Thankful item:  I am thankful that I got to spend time shopping for myself today!!

Vlog regarding thursday thoughts and weigh in day!

Vlogs I made instead of blogs!  It is two parts, about 14 minutes total. Check it out!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LSf4ygp_aWc

My day

So ok, I am more relaxed and at ease to write this whole shebang down about what happened today.  To start off I have been SOO nervous of the doctor saying, well we cant do anything in your situation, or you need to loose X before we can treat you.  Well needles to say, neither happened-thank God. I was figureing it would be pricey, but not as crazy pricey as it is/was.  So upfront we had to pay 325 for a new patient consult, this was semi ok. We have an HSA, so insurance adjusts how much we have to pay, then we pay the balnce on our HSA debit card thingy.  All was ok at this point, then we were given an outline of costs, now generaly our insurance covered testing, and some consult fees, but no treatment fees were covered at all. It is that was with most of wisconsin patients apperantly.  Ok, so the low down on fees are this: Male testing required fees before insurance coverage is like $600 bucks, that is covered. The female tests would be like $2400 bucks. yeech!  So if we were to go through with it or deductable would have come and gone-fast!!  The actual prepossed treatment would be $4600 -$5100 PER MONTH!!! Seriously. My Goodness.  So um, yeah it was pretty much out of the question. The cost is IUI treatment and meds-but still seriously, oh my gosh! Even if I did have a job, and made the same amount as Kevin, we still would not be able to afford it. Jeez, you have to be a lawyer or doctor just to afford it-or government worker...
 So after we got out of the appointment I started tearing up. Why do my emotions come out at the most inappropriate times.  So by the time we were about to walk past the bathrooms, I had to dash in and try to get control of myself, wich temporarily worked. I got to my car, kissed the hubbs and started to cry in the car.  I guess in a way I didnt know why I was reacting this way, but at the same way I do. Kevin phrased it exactly right "my hopes were dashed" and that is true. It is something every couple wants-to have a child of their own flesh and blood.  Now dont get me wrong, adoption is great but it is different.  
So today I fell apart, and kinda discovered something about my self at the same time.  I never thought I was an emotional eater, but after today I seriously think I am.  This afternoon I took a drive (my way of relaxing) and picked up some water and peanut butter M&Ms. Yeah... Oh well Now I know, and I will try to have like granola bars or something on hand in my car.   so Annonymus-here it is-the blog you wanted!! :p  

So other than that, goals AGAIN have kinda been on the back burner. grr.  I still havent finished book #4, havent done anymore knitting, or anything really on my list. I need to focus on it more huh??!  But i did finish a personal goal yesterday. It was not one of my 101 in 1001 goals, but a goal I have had for a while.  The goal was to walk a consecuative 3 miles. I did it!! I was super happy yesterday. Now I am gonna work up to four miles.  I "may" enter a 5k walk run thing in may or june. I am not gonna run it, id be a walker wich i am totally cool with.  I have put my c25k training on hold until I loose more weight, I havent been able to control my breathing for the run I did. I felt like I was gasping for air. But I am fine air wise when I am walking, yes I breathe a bit heavier after a mile or two, but I can still breathe full breaths!   So today, other than gorgeing on food (I also had a cheeseburger at MCD) I also did not get any excersize in. But I will tomorow, hopefully it isnt as cold as it is today.brr.  Good night!!
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I am thankful that I able to recognize and admit when I have failed myself! 

S a w e e t!!

So, today I did it!! Yes indeedy do! I finally did a 3 miler!! All in one trip to!  My feet were pretty tired afterwards. I got another blister, and of course i popped it. Dumb me. So my foot is stingy feeling when i walk.  I have it gaused and taped up, so we will see how it is tommorow.  So the food plan is going pretty good, even though i have eatten out at subway a few times this week.  I have written it all down at least, wich is an accomplishment. Ok so i cant think anymore, hubby and his brother are watching ledgend of the seeker.

I can smell it... Sucess that is!!

Yeah! Ok so today I weighed in, lost two pounds this week. I think I would have lost more  had I not binged on food friday and saturday I think.  But that is ok with me, really I am so happy with the two pound loss!! yeah!!  Also I started training for my 5k.  I am following the C25k program (couch to 5k). It was created by a guy at coolrunning.com (i think).  I have the ipod touch app that gives you audable cues when you are supposed to walk or run.  Needless to say, it totally beat me today!!  My biggest problem I think is actually being able to take in more air - change my breathing pattern.  I was quite winded after like 15 or 20 seconds of running.  I am thinking depending on how this week turns out training wise, I may just repeat this weeks routines next week.  I am not sure I like running, I think partially cause I got winded easily. 

On other diet/nutrition news I plan to start me week off tracking calories and points again.  I did super good through out the week, but stunk it up when the weekend came around.  I also plan to walk for a half hour twice a day like I did last week.  I am starting to like my time either in my thoughts or listening to music when taking my walks.  Kevin even joined me on a few walks! 

I am happy that I am now watching what I eat, really I am. I am also quite impressed with my abbility to stick to it.  Normally, on a bad day like I had last week, I would have given up. This time I just said, well that day was bad but tommorow is a new day. 
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Other goals I am working on is the 100 operation beautiful post its.  I did my first one today!! woohoo!! I posted it in the womens restroom at church.  Also this week I plan to work on cleaning the house deeply-a good deep spring cleaning.  I am thinking about working on the basement as well.  I need to go through the closet cabinets in the basement and reorganize it and try to get things that we dont use out of the closet and given to GW.   Also hope to finish #4, I am still slowly reading it. I havent set much time aside just to read that book. 
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So, I decided also since i am putting my food journal out there I might as well put my weight out there. please no judgeing. This is my weight, to carry around, not yours. Thanks!

Bible Verse o The Day
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  Matthew 11:28

Thankful item o the day
Today I am thankful for God's sacrifice. He took my sins and died on the cross for me- and you!

Pics of Postcards

Pictures of postcards and canceled stamps can be found on my flickr page.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/21559896@N03/sets/72157623660805730/

My Off Day

So today originally I planned to stay on diet plan, but i ended up not.  But I am ok with that-really I am. I had didnt go to overboard though, I dont think.  Also I didnt journal my food, I might, but it might just be to depressing to see all the points spent. A run down of what I ate, hmm.  Breakfast kevin made me 5 blueberry pancakes, those were about 7 points total, I had cantalope, 1 point, linner (lunch dinner brunch thingy) was at Jimmy johns, had a ham and cheese sub. Then tonight we rented two redbox movies-both of wich sucked- and then gordged on some food. I had a diet pepsi, some goldfish, some nilla waffers, and alot of baked cheetos, so all together bunches of calories!!  I also did not get any activity in today or yesterday. Today was do to the crappy weather. 
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On other news, I received not one, not two but THREE post cards between yesterday and today!! wahoo!! I received on from Norway, Italy, and Great Brittan.  Sooo cool! It is cool to send them, but so much cooler to receive em!!  I currently have three traveling, one to russia, portugal, and Finland.  Hope they get there sometime soon. 
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Today I am thankfull for my husband, and his willingness to deal with my spur of the moment want to change my hair!!  I love him so much, I cant beleive it will be three years this may. And guess what?  I will be completing two goals around my anniversary!! wahoo!!  We are scheduleing a weekend trip to chicago to see the shedd and museum of science & industry!! I am soo excited!!!!
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Goals for this week include, going back on plan diet wise tommorow, finally-i hope-finishing book #4, working on the knitting a little more and um, i am not sure what else. Maybe do some operation beautiful posts?? If i remember my post it pad, i'll put one up in church!! hehe!!!
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Bible verses for this past week-

For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.  Hebrews 4:12

This is His command: to believe in the name of His Son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as He commanded us.  1 John 3:23

Out of my funk - i think

So yeah, last night I ranted on about how I gorged on food. Well today I through my body through another loop. Yes I know. Normally I dont eat enough, well today was that. I ate a yogurt at like 10:30 then didnt eat again until 3pm.  So from three on, I have been slowly eating. It is good stuff though, but still.  So I gotta say I am happy I blogged about my breakdown yesterday, it got me kinda back on track today and forgetting about yesterday.  There is one thing I am regretting is that i havent done any physical activity today, probably wont tommorow either since it is supposed to snow.  Hopefully on sunday I can get back into a groove. But still I think I have done alot of activity earlier this week from monday through yesterday.  Other goals also are on the back burner, except i did create an etsy account!! wahoo!! The reason I wanted to do it is, I want invites made up for a cook out that we are going to have in june. I couldnt find any I liked, I set up an alchemy (they call it) or request for this type of a card. But Kevin does not want to pay 50 bucks so I am not sure, I may end up just making my own invites after all. hmm. 

Gotta learn to take it one day at a time

So yes, this is the second post today, yes I know. But i am a little angry with myself and wanna get it out. So I ate so good this morning for breakfast, and for lunch really.Kevin and I then go to subway, i stay within my guidelines, we come home, Kevin did a little bit of calking our front stoop, then we went for my second walk of the day. So from the time I get home from the walk until pretty much now I cant keep stuff out of my mouth! I just keep eating and eating. grrr.  I ate three servings of nilla wafers and two servings of goldfish, a yogurt and a slice of cheese. Seriosly OMG i though I was trying to loose weight-not stuff my face.   But at the same time-that is one of my fears when I start to watch what I eat. I feel like, oh great I am gona get restricted on what I can eat i need to get all the bad food I can.  I hate it when it happens. That is usually how i feel when I screw up one day.  I need to learn to take it on day and even one meal at a time, but that is something hard for me to learn.      On other news relateing to dieting, I did both of my walks. The first was 6 times around my block wich is 1.5 miles and this evening Kevin and I walked a route through the other condos to grange. That is about 1.4 miles.  The odd thing is, this last walk, the both times I did the 1.4 mile walk the time was longer than the one for 1.5 miles. not sure why. oh well.  I am happy I am able to finish the 1.4 or 1.5 mile walks.  I am not trying to race or get under a certain minute per mile, but more a completion of walk.   Ok so i am hopefully done with my rant.

Im impressed!

Ok, so needless to say I am quite happy and surprised that I am still on track. I dont know what is different this time, maybe because it is just about me and I dont care what others say negative or what. Woohoo!!  So I still have to post pics-i know. I have been busy running errands and taking walks.  So I think that is partially what is keeping me on track. I am trying to challenge myself, I want to be able to walk for 3 miles at one time by the end of april. Right now I am walking 3 miles a day for the last few days, but it isnt all in one walk. I have two different walks during the day and together they are 3 miles-so 1.5 miles each.  Also my eating has been fairly good. I eat on average 32 WW points-wich is more than my daily target by two. But I noticed if I just ate the 30 points I would still be under calorie range that sparkpeople.com wants me to eat.  Yesterday was one of my Oh My God moments. We went to Cousins subs, needles to say from now on I will be getting the mini subs. I got a Club sub, wich was 16 points. Yeah...    Also am on the look out for a good cheesecake like recipies-i am an addict!!  I tryed something last night, Kev helped figure out the points, but I thought it was to small and to many cals. I made a little cheesecake shooter, RF Nilla wafer ground up on the bottom, 2 T of philly cheese cake filling in a little shot glass. It was yummy, But the cals were crazy on it.  like 100 cals. to much for a daily treat.  Not satisfieing enough either because it was so small.  Ah well.  So I was so happy today when I stepped on the scale, I weigh about four pounds less, but I am not gonna take that number yet, I wanna see where I am one week from when I started-so this sunday I will weight myself for good and record it.  So other goals, still on the backburner, havent dont any more stitches on the knitting item. I have read a few more pages in my fourth book. Well ok, so technically I am working on the be under 200lbs goal and the be able to walk a half marathon goal. So I should be happy for that.  Leaving to go on my morning walk!.

Just a quick update blog

So I just wanted to update my blog with how my diet went today. I am really happy!! I ate really well. I still have a few points / calories to eat tonight, but I am mostly done eating wise.  I even got two excersize sessions in today! wahoo!!  So at four I took a walk around my neighborhood by myself with the ipod.  Iwas just under a mile. It was .82miles. Then tongih Kevin and I walked a bit longer-but still not a full mile. I walked .95 miles.  So tonight not only did I log my walks on spark people, but I also mapped my next walk. I am trying to walk up to 1.25 miles.  After I reach that I will change my mini goal, but for now thats the goal. So also I am just realizing after many dieting attempts that I have to do this for myself, not for my dad, mom, husband or who ever else, I need to do it for myself.  Ok-good nite! Plan to post journal photos tommorow.

Tuesday 3/16 Blog

So yesterday went well diet wise. I tracked my calories eaten on sparkpeople.com and journeled ww points in a journel.  I also took a walk around my neighborhood with Kevin last night.  I walked a total of 3/4 of a mile. I could have gone a little farther, but Kevin was cold so we stopped.  I decided instead of writing all the info of what I wrote in my jounel I will take a picture of each page at the end of the day and post it on a new page in the blog.  I am going to do this as a sort of accountability. I will have my journel page out there for who ever to see.  Hopefully this keeps me on track.
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On other news, I got my subaru back from the dealer yesterday, we purchased a special coating for the interior/exterior. Still not sure that the purchase of the coating was a good idea. I guess we decided to get it because I was really nervous of fees we would have to pay at the end of our lease for dents dings, ect. The interior coating is supposed to make nothing stick to the interior, like if you spill your coffee or soda or something, it is supposed to come right out, if it doesnt the company will come out and get the stain out at no cost to me. The exterior coating is supposed to protect against dents dings, ect.  So in this case as well if you get a ding they will pop it out at their expence.  So we will see if it is really worth it or not at the end of the lease.  The car reeks because of the coating though.  I had to leave all my windows open overnight to air it out. I got a headache just from the fumes. They are supposed to be non toxic, but i think it was quite toxic to my head!!!

I started a new book, no i did not finish the original book four, but I just got my new Rosie Odonnell book and had to start it last night. I gotta say she is one of my favorite actor/actress/famous person.  I really liked her first book and I am liking her second book. I am 44 pages in already!

So last night I made a light version of meat loaf-I really like my dads homemade meatloaf but it is so high in cals and fat because it is made with ground beef. So I found a low fat ground turkey meat loaf. It had ketchup, eggs, onion soup mix and tomato paste on top. I didnt totally like it. I am not sure if it was the soup or what it was that made it kinda icky, but i dont think I will make the recipie again.  We have leftovers, so of course we will eat that-try to not waste food. But i need to find some lower fat recipies that I like, and that Kevin will eat. He is not a meat eater and I am. So any non fish recipies you got? Send em my way!!

Today I am thankfull for my husband-he really is the best guy I know. Always there for me, even when I act like an ass.  Yesterday I was thankfull for my loaner car. Even though it was the same type of car, it was a higher end car version. So I was able to live in the lap of car luxary for a few hours!! Todays bible verse is:
The Lord your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commands.— Deuteronomy 7:9

Weight blog

So ok, I know I posted a blog earlier, but I am posting another one.  Tonight I want to talk about weight and weight loss. I have yet again restarted sparkpeople.com, I am not sure what is wrong with my lack of motivation and lack of desire towards weight loss.  I know what i do and dont do right, well i think I know at least!  Today I also decided to do an at home version of weight watchers. No I did not sign up for ww online, I have the books and I will just rely on them for point values, ect.  I need to get moving to, I know that is a big part to loosing weight. My plan is to start again tommorow-we will see if I am motivated.hhmm. Tommorow I gotta take my car in for a protectant coating application. They are gonna give me a loaner for the day so i should be fine mobility wise. I really want to go to the gym, but my brain will work overtime on why i shouldnt go, it is frustrating.    Also with weight loss, I have a hard time staying on track, but I am hoping with blogging, I might be able to stay on track better.  I am going to create a page that I may/may not update with what I have eaten in the day.  Ok so hopefully wont fall to far off the wagon. 

Ah Sunday....

So today we had an early morning, church at 8:30 am. That is way to early for me, especially because the morning prior we were woken up by my mil talking on her phone at 6am-seriously...  Ok, so I really dreaded going to church, I really dont like the catholic faith, but that is me and my problems.  So after church we went out to breakfast as a big family. The food was great! So other than that today was pretty much a stay at home day.  We did go out for dinner, more to see how bright the lights were than to actually eat.
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Some goals that I am going to try to work on this week are finishing book #4 (still), work on my knitting project, and other than that not sure.  I will officially have blogged regarding 101 in 1001 for a month tommorow. I have attempted the daily blogging for a month with out success. Even if I had blogged daily for a month, I still would leave that goal up as I wasnt to participate in NaBloPoMo.  But also this does not mean that I will not post as often as I have.  I plan to blog every day, but it may end up being two or three days between posts.
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Tonight I am thankful for my family-no matter how angry I am at them, they are my family and they will be there for me when noone else is. 
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Bible Qoute o the Day
I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you. Psalm 119:11

Excitement at every corner!

Ok, so earlier this week (Wednesday to be exact) I wrote that we signed a guarentee for a subaru, well we did.  Thursday I go and talk to my dad about how we decided to do this, and well he wasnt super happy nor was he upset, wich i would hope is good.  But i know the view he is having in his head "ok, Kevin is the only one working, can they really afford this?"  And the answer is yes, but the money will be tighter than before. But at the same time, I dont have to worry about my car breaking down for the millionth time.  So prior to wednesday we had made arrangements for me to go with my  MIL to her doctors appointment so I could kinda inform the family on what is going on with her health. Also told her she could sleep over. Her doc appointment was friday after noon and then she came to the house. The boy came over and hubbys brother came over. It was pretty fun, although loud.  Ok, so today we went to go sell the old subby to carmax - they offered double the trade in amount that subaru city did. Ah well, ok so we sold it and then drove back to milwaukee and bought the new subaru-and oh man do I love my car. It is a 2010 Subaru Forester.  It rocks, it is a little bigger than the legacy and has a hatchback wich I love!  Also I love that It has so many electrical outlets thingys! It has three! It also plays ipods and stuff!  Ok so I will try to stop bragging!  
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So goals were on the back burner yet again. gggrrr. I really want to get back on a schedue eating wise and reading wise.  I am reading the second book in the twilight series. I read the first book in January before my 101 in 1001.  Other goals that I am working on is the knit item.  I am slowly going along at it. A row here and a row there.  The soda goal totally was not on my mind this week either.  I had a soda at least three days this past week. Since I failed two weeks in a row I am gonna put that on hold for now. 
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So tommorow Kevin and I are going to church, but not our usually church. We are going back to my childhood catholic church. My parents still go there. Tommorow the service is in memory of my grandmother.  It will be good to remember her again, but i am not looking forward to the service.  It is so repetitive and usually the "Father" acts holyer than thou. Dont these people know they can have a relationship with Christ outside of repetitiveness and holyer than thou attitudes.  But then again, what place do I have to judge if I am trying to strive to be more like Christ. Ah well. 
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So thankfull items, hmmm. I am thankful that God has given me these almost 30 years, even though there were ups and downs. I am thankful that i have a new car!!  Also I am thankful for a wonderful couple, with a beautiful little boy. Their faith in Jesus is wonderful and really wants me to grow further in my faith with Jesus. I will miss them once they continue their missionary schooling. 
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Tonight I am gonna start to write a bible verse on the bottom of my posts. Tonights post comes from 2 Corinthians 5:17.    Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold all things have become new.  2 Corinthians 5:17

No title blog title

Wow, again really stinking it up with the daily blogging.  Oh well, i was busy with car shopping.  Yesterday we went to look at cars again, no true intent on buying one that night, but looking more intently this time. First we stopped at the local toyota shop, and we wanted to look at a rav 4 up close & personel since it was coming in second in my list. They only had them outside and by this time it was raining so we didnt really want to walk their lot looking at cars.  We knew what the 2009 rav 4 looked like, we even test drove it last summer. So with a new test drive kinda out of the question, we sat down and talked money. How much, over how many months, blah blah blah. Any how they gave us a very basic estimate of $250 per month on a 36mo lease. This piqued our interest. But I was concerned about the whole recall, and wasnt sure that this was a model year we wanted. But at the same time if we bought a two year old car, the payments wouldnt go down that much and you cant lease a used car.  Ok so we thanked the guy and went to the Subaru dealer. We went in and looked at two of the models we were interested in, the forrester and the outback.  The forrester was right for us. We went and talked to the guy saying ok what is your price for this at xyz month term. It was to high. We hemmed and hawed. he said well lets go for a test drive-we did and we liked it even more. I was ready to walk away though. I say ok, only way we will think about you guys is if you can match the estimate from toyota. They did. We hemmed and hawed some more and then said yes. I will have a brand new car on saturday!! wahoo!! granted it will be a lease but still.  So tonight we decided to check out the appraisal  at carmax for me to sell it to them. They offered $2000, wich was more than what Subaru City was offering for the trade in-so we are selling it to carmax instead of trading it in like we said!
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On to other things, yesterday I went with my mom to the Milwaukee Public Museum. Normally I HATE MPL. It is so boring and the stuff seems to NEVER change.  Well we went to see the special exibit. I was not at all expecting this to be good.  I liked body works, but that was only hosted by MPL, not organized and put together by MPL.  Ok so even though I thought it would suck, I really liked it and would totally recomend this exibit. Totoally would. It was really interesting to me to see all the artifacts and to hear the story behin the dead sea scrolls. My mom didnt like it as much because she didnt like all the bible refrinces since she wasnt really familiar with the bible. but she thought it was ok  So again as a reminder-yes go and see it, it is good!
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On still more new news, I got some mail! they are non bill mail! wahoo! I had requaested abunch of seed catalogs from places that Martha Stewart likes and today i received 3 in the mail! I love getting non bill mail!!  I am totally excited for spring and digging in the dirt-yess!!  I have a brown thumb but i love to attempt this hobby called gardeing!! This year I am making a total vegetable garden! I will also have herbs, I already started those actually and there are actual little reen sprouts sticking out of the dirt now!!
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So goals have really been on a back burner this week.  I have not read very much into my fourth book, and have totally flunked on the no soda thing. We have been so busy that i just havent had much time. I did a few more rows of knitting though wich i am proud of!  Also bought my sudoku and word search books!  I took a picure of the new car with the berry so that will take a day or so to post to flickr. Today not sure what to take a pic of...hmm...
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Today I am greatful for seed catalogs-oh how I love thee!  Also yesterdays thankfull item is.duh. Thankful that hubbu FINALLY made up his mind and decided to go along and say yes to the car!!

A post regarding 365 project photos

So ok, I tryed to make a page for the photos, but it took to long and I figured who in their right mind is going to want to scroll through 100+ photos just to see the photo of the day. So I am going to be actively using flickr.  I will post the photo to flickr then the link I will post on my blog so you can see the photo!  Hope that works!! Here is the link to my main [age so you can see the ones I havent posted in a while.  http://www.flickr.com/photos/21559896@N03/sets/72157623443405772/

A bit of a blog redo

So this weekend was fairly calm and enjoyable. I have not posted a photo in a while, even though i have indeed taken a photo a day. So i plan to make a blog page for my photo o the day and post the photos there. Also I am going to make a page for my goals. This will mainly be for me so I can edit it easier when I complete goals or add new ones.  So onto other topics. Saturday was pretty mellow, we went to the home store on saturday like I had written, then I knit more of the blanket. Sunday we had AV duty at church, so we were there at 8:30, servie started at 10:45. So after church we went and grabbed a bit to eat, and we went to goodwill again. Kevin wasnt really happy, but oh well! I found three more shirts that I really liked, also found four paperback books that were 89 cents each! woohoo!  One of said books is schindlers list-and yes I know it is sad. I have seen the movie once, but never read the book, so I thought what better oppertunity!  So later on sunday I talked Kevin into us taking his mom out to eat.  We stop by and she is really concerned about some sores by her ear, Kev and I get a little concerned, and thusly decide to take her to a walk in clinic to get em checked out and make sure she doesnt have anything bad!  Turns out the sores are caused by her stress. The doc explained it to us as when you have stress some people tend to pick at their skin, then eventually if picked enough a scabe forms and she keeps reinfecting the sore with bacteria each time she picks it.  So she was scolded sorta to not pick the sores and was given a script for antibacterial pills.  So that made last night a late night. 
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So this past week I tryed to work on two goals. No soda for a month and jouneling what I eat and how I feel for a month. Well I failed at both.hmph.  The soda was actually pretty easy until the weekend when we went out for lunch and dinner. At lunch I get lemonade and then later took a sip of Kevins cup, and then realized I drank soda.  So after the mistake I decided to go all out and order white soda on sunday.  The soda was so yummy!! lol!! I have as of today restarted the goal-lets see if i can do it!! The other goal of journaling I totally failed at. I journeled part of a day and then forgot from then on.  
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So this week I plan to finish book #4, though I probably wont-my knitting may came first!!   I plan to continue on the no soda for a month. Today I worked on a newly listed goal. The goal was to join postcrossing.com and I did! I also sent out five postcards.  I made my own postcards out of scrapbooking  cardstock. I cut it to just under the maximum size that the post office allows for postcards.  So the five post cards went to  Germany, Finland, Portugal, Italy & Russia. So I wrote these out and took em to the post office today. I looked online and saw they all cost $.98 to send. So instead of waiting in line I bought 5 $1 stamps from the auomatic machine at the post office. hopefully these are the right thing to put on em-N if you read this did you buy international stamps or just regular stamps up to 98cents?? lemme know in the comments area.   Ok so other than these, I am pretty excited for when I get my postcards!! I am guessing it will be in about a month-maybe sooner??  Once my people get their post card-they enter a code and then  am added to the top of the list of people who get a post card!! I am excited!!!
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So todays photo of the day is actually of the post cards that I sent out.  Today I am greatfull for automatic machines at the post office so I dont have to deal with grumpy government emplyees!

two new goals

So today is kinda a rant about two things. So today Kevin and I went to menards to redeem our rebate thingy we earned last month. Oh my goodness. Seriously how can some one take three hours in that store-seriously?  Well so today we bought some wall repair stuff to rapair an area in our half bath, an additional door trim peice, some caulk, and a new miror for the half bath. Shopping for all that took three hours-omg!!
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Other topic of rant is in regards to my mil. Ok so in a way I feel sorry for her. So the story is, that I have in the past gotten quite angry at hubby and his brother about their lack of concern towards their mother. They dont really care, or blow what I am saying off, so then I am the one taking responsability for their mother.  I dont really have a problem with taking her to the doctor or helping her declutter her house, but seriously that is the boys responsability to step up and take care of it, not mine.  I am just pissed at their lack of real concern or effert toward taking care of her. UGH!
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I am hoping to get around to posting the pictures tommorow.  So today I am thankful for my knitting. I am thankful to be doing something soothing, and I have decided to keep the finished project. But at the sametime I hope I dont become one of those people that makes or buys stuff for that future child that hasnt been created yet, if you know what  mean!  Oh well tommorow is church, and we are the av peeps so it is an early day for us!! Oh also, I am adding to my goals again!  Goal #103 is participate in post crossing-sorry N-i coppied you it sounded like fun!  Also I copyed you on goal #104, wich is facebook free day. I was originally thinking internet free day, but then I thought, what am I thinking!! So it is facebook free day! I need to have at least 50 FB free days before the end of my 1001 days.

Fridays post

So tady was ok on my end. Had to run some errands, went to go pick up my developed roll of film from walgreens, little did i realize I shot a roll of B&W. So all my beaustiful sunshine pics dont look that great in B&W. Ah well, plan to scan them and put em on flickr. So tonight, again I took a picture of the day, but it is still on my phone-will post tommorow.  The pic is of the damn geese that seem to flock to our neighborhood and take forever to move off the road!  So not much else is going on, I started a little journel about what I eat and how I feel about what I eat, not sure if i can stick to it!  Also received a note from the lady I made an appoinment with for at the end of the month. The letter discussed how long the appointment is, and discussed what they plan to do during the initial appointment.  There is like three parts, the nurse will show us around the clinic facility, then we will meet with an insurance expert to find out what our insurance will cover-though we pretty much know what they will/wont cover. Then we sit with the doc & nurse to discuss our options.  I am getting stressed about this, but i hope it turns out ok.  Well that is about it for tonight, oh the hubby had a friend over and I pretty much shot my diet plans out the window with tonights meal! We had pizza, garlic bread and I made a chocolate cake, so a kazillion calories there...ugh...  Ok for real I am done now!!
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TOnight I am thankful for my car, I love to drive and driving really eases my stress. After I get in an argument or similar situation, all i want to do is drive around. ALso thankfull that my car is still running, we had issues with the subby a year or two ago, Kevin did major surgery on it. Headgasket repair, and coolant system redo.

tonights post

Ok so again, really nothing to talk about. Got a call from my endo about my labs coming back as my synthroid level was slightly high. I am not a perfect pill taker, most likely I accidentally double dosed, and thusly made my readings high. I am rather petrified to call her assistant back and tell her this and find out if the other test result was good or bad. I wish doctor's had public emails, OMG I totally would rather email her than talk to her on the phone. Seriously-sometimes my phone phobia comes back strong.  This time it is different than when I was a kid. When I was a kid, I was petrified to call people, because i was affraid that they would not remember me. Now I am petrified to call my doctor, because I dont want to get scolded like a little kid.  Oh also I joined sparkpeople.com  I really need the ambition to do the whole weight loss thing. I really want to be healthy, happy and fit. I never was, and I doubt i ever will be.  I am the type of person that i need to see results right away to stay motivated.  Sorry i am ranting about weight again, I guess i need to figure out how to talk about something other than that.  Today was a kinda blah day. Kevin and I talked, and he seemed to finally realize what i was trying to tell him about the cost of the whole fertility treatment probability. Is thinking about adoption, but that is just as bad cost wise, and Kevin is to picky on what type of child he would want. Ah well, one more month and we will see what my options really are.  Today I am thankfull for my husband. We went on a mini date. We went to TGI fridays for food, and since then I have been in a pretty bumming mood.  Ah well, tommorow I will post todays photo. It is of my knitting. I started a non scarf project, but really it is a basic scarf on drugs!! lol! it is a basic stocking knit baby blanket. It may be given away to friend or family who are expecting, but i may just hold on to it.  Ok good nite-my laptop battery is about to die!

Insomnia

Sometimes I suffer from insomnia, or my body just doesnt know when to go to sleep. Well last night was my latest episode of this. We went to bed late last night, well I just couldn't fall asleep, to msny thoughts in my head or whatever. So I ended up staying up till 3:30 reading. So of course I ended up finishing the book i had started like a day or two ago. It was a fast read-very fast actually.The book is 219 pages, but the spacing of the type made it a fast read.  It was a decent book, kinda interesting if you ever were a fan of Rosie. It did jump around for the first quarter or so of the book, which was kinda annoying. Ah well, it is a good enough read to recommend it to people.  So after I went to bed so late, some how this morning I was WIDE awake at 7:45, super crazy. W will see how today goes.

Another one bites the dust...

Another goal bites the dust.  Wahoo! Today I completed two goals actually! I finally went to the damn DMV to get my address changed on my licence. I figure since its been a year might as well do it! Well let me say how much i loathe the dmv-oh my goodness-seriously can these people go any slower? So at the dmv I went to, you had to wait in line 3 times. First line was to get your paperwork looked at and given a ticket with your number, the next isnt really a line-but sit and wait til your number is called. Then I had this nice but slow guy at the booth i was called to.  He was nice, he corrected my file as i got the licence changed. I had brought my plate renewal form as 2nd id, well apperantly had my address on file as being a milwaukee address. It is a very common mistake with our address, but had i really lived in milwaukee, i would have to pay a "wheel tax" at the time of plate registration.wich would be an additional $10.  the third line was to get your photo taken and thusly given a new id. OM goodness-have i said lately how much i hate my DL image-my god can i be any fatter-ugh... So also tonight I finished my wedding book. It is one of those books were you jot down all your memories and fill in the questions asked. It was good to reminisce from the wedding.  I cant beleive it will be three years in may-so crazy how the time flys by. 

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So ok I know I have talked about weight alot lately, sorry but i plan to talk about it again...sigh.  So I really dont look or feel beautiful. I dont know what my problem is. I have always had a bad self image, but recently it has really hit me head on.  I haven't stepped on the scale in a month, I hate looking at the weight on the scale-sometimes I just wanna cry. It is to much for me to go on a diet. Diets always fail me. I seem to need someone to keep me accountable-but even then I dont always do well.  I need to loose weight, I know there is no magic pill-I just wish there was... sigh. I dont have the motivation or energy to go to the gym or excersize - never did.  I know that is a key to looseing weight, but I seem to be lacking motivation.  I feel I have always been watched or monitered on what I eat-even as a child. I think that is why I have issues with weight.  Arg- I guess that is my problem.
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So today I am going to do part of a goal. The goal was to do 50 creative writeing prompts. I cose #2. The prompt is: Pick out photo #14 and write about it for 10 minutes.  Ok so I chose photo #14 on my memory card.  It is of Kevin puting ice skates on at Eble ice rink in waukesha.  We were there to celebrate my neices 8th birthday. I had alot of fun taking pictures of everyone from the family that was ice skateing.  Kevin wanted to skate but was having problems with size of his skates, they were not tight enough for him.  But he did finally find the right size and was off raceing my mom and sister around the rink.  I had fun watching, as I do not ice skate-never was very good with my balance, I mean heck I didnt learn to ride my bike until I was like 10 because of balance!  So back to the party-after we skated for a while we all went to my sister and brother in laws house for some food and presents.We had some yummy pasta thing from an italian restaraunt and some salad. The cake was actually some really good chocolate cupcakes that my mom made. Wich I finally learned the secret recipie!! So my neice got lots of goodies for her birthday.  It was so sweet, my neice was so happy and said that she liked haveing the family parties better than the friend partys.  I actually do enjoy going to my sisters house for a party. I am able to talk to my brother in laws family -wich is always fun to talk to.  Ok so technically it wasnt ten minutes-but ah well I have come close!! 
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So today I am thankful for technology and the ability to annoy my hubby with constant FB and email checking! hehe!!

Also Todays Pic O day Is of my lovely Kitty Kaylee!!